I'm told I have a
suspicious mind. I prefer to say I have a healthy dose of cynicism
with a spot
of paranoia.
Though it is true, I am suspicious. Crime is all around us. Every day
someone gets robbed or killed and the police can't find a clue.
That's why a guy like me is necessary. Bill Sussman, Private Eye.
My career started
in the second grade when little Myron Golden lost his marbles, twelve
of them, plus an Aggy. Someone stole them from his coat pocket at
recess. I found those marbles. Who but me would have thought that
Vera Teigler was capable of such a heinous crime? And at such a
tender age.
From there, I
progressed to bigger things, each case more impressive than the last.
In middle school, I uncovered the gang responsible for the graffiti
on the bathroom walls. In high school, I uncovered a term paper
forgery business by posing as a football player in need of a grade
fix. None of
my discoveries
made me very popular with my classmates, but sometimes a man has to
do the tough jobs whether he gets extra swirlies or pantsed in gym
class.
Let's not forget
my biggest case to date, the Japanese Sumo Wrestling Pornography
Ring! Okay, so I was wrong that Mr. Sato had a porn studio in back of
his sushi shop. But he was fronting for a bookie, so my suspicions
about illegal activity were correct.
Things have been a
little slow lately, so I've been taking any case that comes my way.
I'm not proud of the fact I'm doing car repos or following deadbeat
dads, but it puts food on the table.
So imagine my
surprise when the blonde walked in. My suspicious nature kicked in
the second
she opened the
door. Trouble had just entered my office. She was a real babe, tall,
thin, willowy - like Lauren Bacall in "The Big Sleep".
Dressed in silk and smelling like Chanel No. 5, she stood across the
desk from me. My knees were weak as I stood to greet her.
"Please, have
a seat, Miss?"
"Oh, Mr.
Sussman, you have to help me!" She burst into tears.
I handed her a box
of tissues. She nodded her thanks and cried like crazy. Not many
babes can
cry like that and
not move their makeup. Bill Sussman's suspicious nature stood up and
said hello.
Any woman who's
sobbing like her heart is broken is gonna leave tracks. Her eyes go
red, her face turns puffy. Not this chick. My professional mien
descended like a lead zeppelin.
"How may I
help you?" I tried again.
"I'm so
sorry," she gulped and sobbed, looking just as perfect as when
she walked in.
The tissues
clutched in her well manicured hands were dry as a bone. She kept her
head down and her hands in her lap. I moved around to the front of
the desk, leaning against the edge.
"It's me,
Bill. Vera Teigler. Don't you recognize me anymore?"
"Little Vera
Teigler from second grade?" My smile nearly split my face in
two. "How ya been, Vera?"
"A little of
this, a little of that," she said with a funny smile that made
me very suspicious indeed. "A lot better than you, you low life
creep!"
And suddenly I'm
looking at the business end of a snub nosed pistol. I figured I had
two choices, grab the gun or put up my hands. Bill Sussman ain't a
hero, dig? My hands flew up and I got real nervous.
"Hey, Vera.
I'm sorry about the marbles, okay?"
"This isn't
about the marbles, you freak! It's about Andy!"
"Andy? Andy
who?"
"Tucker. Andy
Tucker, my boyfriend. Don't you know anything?"
"Come to
think, that name rings a bell or two."
"You were
following him because his wife hired you to find out who he was
seeing on the side. He was seeing ME!" She screamed at me. The
gun wavered in her hand.
"Well, sorry
about that, Vera. Didn't mean to put a dent in your love life."
"She shot
him, you idiot! Shot him dead! You killed the only man I ever loved!
I hate you, Bill Sussman!"
My choices had
just narrowed to one. I leaped at her, grabbing the barrel of the
gun, pushing it out of my face as she pulled the trigger. I felt the
bullet whiz past my ear, the sound of the explosion loud in the small
office. I got the gun away from her, holding it carefully so my
prints wouldn't get on the grip.
"It's over,
Vera. I'm sorry about Andy, but business is business."
"Yeah, well,
he was a pretty lousy boyfriend. Sorry about the gun," she
brushed her hair out of her face. "So, Bill, you seeing
anybody?"
"No," I
grinned. "So, Vera, want to go out for a cup of coffee and talk
about old times?"
"Sure,"
she said, taking my arm.
I smirked. Yeah,
life comes at a guy fast, but sometimes it tosses in a hell of a
ride.
©
2018 Dellani Oakes
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